For the past few nights I’ve been having trouble sleeping. I know that it’s probably my fault that I don’t ever sleep very well; I stay up into the wee hours of the morning until my entire being is screaming at me to just close my eyes and sleep and even then I still take about a half hour to fall asleep because I’m too stubborn for my own good. It’s not that I don’t enjoy sleep (because I do), it’s just that I feel like I never have enough time in my day and that I can somehow make my day extend until the time when I’ve finally closed my eyes and passed out, even if that time ends up being 4 o’clock the next morning.
I kind of want to blame my “I never get enough sleep” problem on the whole “teenagers are wired differently” study, but I don’t particularly think that’s the case. I think it’s just because I have so many things to do during the week that I want to get in at least an hour or two of relaxation, which then turns into staying up until I only get two hours of sleep. Then there are times where it’s not that I lose track of the time because I’m drawing or reading. Just a few weeks ago I was practicing on my drawing tablet ( a Wacom 13 HD) when I decided to glance at my phone and suddenly 7:35 p.m. was 5:12 a.m.. Another possibility could just be that I’m hoping I never wake up so I don’t have to go to school (senioritis has dug its claws into me), but I know my parents (and my subconscious) would never allow that.
I actually got sick a few days ago and now I feel like death. I think it’s a sinus infection, but it could be a cold or even just plain allergies (which is unlikely because it’s fricken snowing here). I also admit that if I really wanted to, I could probably make myself go to sleep before 11:00 p.m. but where’s the sleep deprived fun in that? So I guess I’ll just keep getting 10 hours of sleep per week and risking the possibility of getting even more sick and falling asleep in class.
This was the piece I stayed up all night drawing (kissanpoika is one of my web names and is Finnish for “kitten”). It actually only took two hours collectively, but I also kept getting up to do random things like get a snack or use the restroom which is why I stayed up until 5 a.m..